What I did last Friday...

I really didn't know what to expect when I made my way into The Orchid this past Friday night in Koreatown portion of downtown LA, anticipating the start of the Mahalo 15,000/17,000/19,000 terms party. I guess I expected to be more nervous than I was.

To reset, I was asked by one of my colleagues here at Mahalo, Nicole, to serve as a "co-host". The party, you see, was karaoke, and so I suppose because I've sang at karaoke bars once or twice, I was a natural fit to lead others through the evening.

But to be fair, all I really did was sing a lot (maybe more than even I'm used to) and punch in the numbers for what the others would sing. Now there was a lot of video shot from the night, and a lot of pictures were snapped away. However, there has been a "website posting embargo" which forbids me from even showcasing any of the action from that night. I'd have an easier time getting Wayne Gretzky to come out of retirement than posting anything from that night.

I would use this space to "dish" on happenings and let loose with some fun (not embarrassing) stories, but all I can do is respect the "What happens at Mahaloke stays at Mahaloke" mantra and list my play list of selections, which for those that know me wasn't exactly my A-List material:
Let Her Cry, Blue Eyes, Sweet Caroline, Bridge over Troubled Water, Enter Sandman, U Can't Touch This, Pretty Woman, Born to Run, Every Breath You Take, You Got It, and Born in the USA. There were also several instances where I joined in on songs, and even one instance where I was the subject of a song (many took to inserting my nickname in a version of TLC's "Creep", which took on quite the double entendre).

Still, a great time was had by all (you'll just have to trust me on that).

On Saturday, the first ever "Mahalo Hoops" outing took place on the campus of UCLA, and featured some athletic play - with me just trying to keep up. Still, those that know me will no doubt understand that I was able to have a few "get me involved" moments.

Today was slightly disappointing, in that some of my fellow co-workers talked up dressing in Halloween costumes for the party, and then when the overwhelming majority wanted a more 'formal' approach to the Friday night dress code, I figured we'd just make up for this today, the actual holiday itself. And I was initially encouraged that I wouldn't be alone when I noticed several commuters on my way in had done the same.

Nevertheless, except for C.K. Sample's dog, I was the only fool willing to actually wear a costume today. So much for team spirit! I am including a photo taken for those to see me as an umpire:



Oh well...

As for this weekend's version of "the Most Important Game in the History of Organized Sports", I am picking the Belichick Gang to win, but rooting for the Colts. Like any big game with an even match-up on paper, count on turnovers and special teams play to be the difference makers.

Cocktails anyone?

ITEM ONE: The World's Smallest Indoor Karaoke with Drinks Party

So the Mahalo company shindig, which will be referred to as "Mahaloke", takes place this evening here in Los Angeles. It is ironic for me to have the chance to witness many of comrades in arms 'throwing back a few' on the eve of one of my favorite sporting events, "The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party".

For those not familiar, this would be the Florida-Georgia football game, held every year in Jacksonville, and featuring a great deal of consumption in and around the stadium. In many cases, the drinking will begin today, some 24 hours before kickoff.

In the last couple of years, the two schools have tried to move away from the "Cocktail" moniker in the name of their rivalry, and with good reason. I lived in J-Ville for roughly 2 years, and only attended the 1997 game. And I can tell you that the action outside the stadium was much more intense and dramatic than inside the stadium. Of all those between the ages of 17-24 in the United States that were drunk that day, about 65% of them were concentrated in the Alltel Stadium parking lot.

It was a long standing tradition for many a tailgater (or should I spell it "tail-gator"?) to enjoy drinks with people on both sides of the rivalry, marking a special neighborly rivalry for just one day. But in recent years, civility has given way to intensity, and there were several years where the event was marred by violence and deaths, due to both the violence and the alcohol.

So both schools, the Southeastern Conference, and the NCAA, have been trying to encourage the media and fans to move away from the name of the event. But that won't prevent diehards from still referring to it as it is. And it won't stop alcohol advertisements from appearing in the programs sold at the stadium, or in commercials on TV and radio coverage of the game itself.

It's an issue that every major sports league, pro or college, seems to try to sweep under the rug and place a couch over, hoping the viewer won't notice: how to preach responsibility about drinking while taking bags of cash from alcoholic manufacturers.

As for our party tonight, I know that I'll be too busy acting as co-host to drink a lot, not that I would drink a lot if I were just attending. Hopefully our party tonight, and the football game tomorrow in Jacksonville, goes without incident.

ITEM TWO: "California is, dare I say, en fuego..."

I moved out here in March, and to my delight until this past Sunday, there has been a grand total of 4, count 'em, 4 days of rain here in "SoCal". It seemed unnatural for someone who has lived back East my whole life, and I had been told by many7 locals here to expect for us to pay for it. I just didn't figure the tab would be this high.

It's been unbelievable, and a little bit unnerving, to watch many pockets of this area burn to the ground while others go untouched. It reminds me of when I lived in South Florida back in 1992 and seeing the aftermath of destruction caused by Hurricane Andrew, where one community was completely devastated and the two surrounding it had no impact at all.

I'd also like to nominate the hotels that are price gouging people fleeing their homes for the "Have Tony Sopranos Boys Whack Them" award.

ITEM THREE: Time to take off the Scrubs?

Despite the fact that my esteemed blogging colleague Lon (a.k.a. Crushed by Inertia) is a Zach Braff hater, which I totally understand, I am a big fan of the TV show that Braff into a star big enough to allow people like Lon to hate him in the first place: Scrubs. I watch the show because, in no particular order:
(1) John C. McGinley, who plays Dr. Cox, is very funny
(2) Sarah Chalke is a member of "My Future Ex-Wives Club"
(3) I thought the writing was good

Well, if last night's season premiere is any indication, this last season of theirs maybe a case of sticking around one year too long. It's a delicate balance for most successful television shows, trying to gage whether to stop a show leaving the audience wanting more, or cherry-picking off past success in order to grab one more year's worth of checks.

I can't remember watching a single episode and not having at least one laughing-out-loud-to-the-point-of-cackling moment - until last night. Instead, I was left shaking my head wondering if I'm going to be tuning in to the next episode. I mean, I don't mind the "will JD and Elliot get together or not" saga that figures to drag on right until the end. But I just found myself feeling like I went to a steakhouse and having a salad as my meal - very unsatisfied with stomach churning, wondering where I went wrong in my thought process.

As an aside BTW, for those that know me, I will eat a Caesar Salad occasionally, but when it comes to salads in general, I refer to the Toby Ziegler line from The West Wing when he says that he could, "cover this thing with tons of barbecue sauce and it would still taste like the ground..." (miss that show).

Hopefully Scrubs, will get it together. If not, I may begin to echo Lon's sentiments, but aim the venom at more than just Mr. Braff.

BCS Madness

It's official, college football is having it's wildest, most unpredictable season in history. And fans can't get enough of it. Part of the reason we love it so is because just when we think we know everything and can't be surprised, we get our collective hats handed to us.

With apologies to The Ohio State University (who hasn't played anybody of substance yet), the Top 10 of the first BCS standings is unrecognizable: South Florida? Boston College? South Carolina? Kentucky? Arizona State? It's a bizzaro world where the school bullies are getting punched in the face by the supposed "weaklings".

It's like the top programs are like the celebutants: Michigan is Paris Hilton, getting thrown into D-1 "jail" for losing to Appalachian State; USC is Lindsay Lohan, convinced they have no issues before getting busted for dabbling in cocaine (narrow wins over Washington and Arizona) and drunk driving (losing to Stanford? at home?); Florida is Britney Spears, who just can't stay out of the headlines no matter what; and now both LSU and California, #1 and #2 losing the same day, becoming the Nicole Richie and Kim Kardashian of our little girls club.

As for me, we still have 6 more important losses needed to further my cause that leads to more division amongst college football fans than who's better, Angelina or Anniston, for Brad Pitt - a playoff system.

My thoughts on a college football playoff system haven't changed since 2001, when I wrote this article for AllSports detailing my plans for the right way to institute a playoff system within the current bowl system format. The big arguments against a playoff continue to be that the regular season would have less meaning (as the NFL if it's regular season is cheapened by a playoff system) or that the current system works.

So here are the 6 remaining undefeated teams, and who we need them to lose to. This way, with no undefeated teams and a bunch of 1-loss teams, the "who deserves to be selected" arguments can be so loud that only serves as a way to flip many of those onto the playoff system bandwagon:

OHIO STATE: The Yuck-eyes have played only 1 game against a ranked team so far, and have wins over such powerhouses as Youngstown State, Akron, and Kent State. Now comes the meaty part of their schedule: they have roadies at Penn State next week and at Michigan November 17, with home games against Wisconsin and Illinois. Kepp in mind too that they host Michigan State this week, who broke up their perfect season bid of 1999 with a win in Columbus.

SOUTH FLORIDA: Tampa's college is a great story, and they should be #1 right now with quality wins over West Virginia and at Auburn. Who'd have thought that, except for the Jaguars in J-Ville, USF would be the best team in the state of Florida, college or pro. Still, they are Rutgers tonight, and we'll see how they do being the hunted instead of the hunter. Later in the year, they host a Cincinnati team with just 1 loss.

BOSTON COLLEGE: Not since Doug Flutie's magical heave to Gerald Phelan in the Orange Bowl Stadium with time running out 23 years ago have the Eagles generated this much excitement nationally. They haven't been dominate, but they have been precise. Still they have road games at Virginia Tech next week and in Clemson in November they will need to survive, as well as two visits by former Sunshine State powers Miami and Florida State and the ACC Title game.

ARIZONA STATE: The early season wins over Colorado (who account for Oklahoma's only loss) and Oregon State (who account for Kim Kardashian, I mean, California's only loss) look a little better now. Still, the Sun Devils will see the heat of their schedule intensify the next 2 weeks with games versus Cal next Saturday and at Oregon November 3rd - in addition to a visit by USC Thanksgiving Night and their traditional rivalry game with Arizona December 1.

KANSAS: Here's a team that never has football success, so when it happens, it's easy to scoff at it because of the lightweights on their schedule like: Central Michigan, Southeast Louisiana, Toledo, and Florida International. They don't play the Big 12's Big 3 this year: Oklahoma, Texas, and Texas Tech. Still, not even the most passionate Kansas football fan can expect the Jayhawks to Rock Chalk to wins at Colorado this Saturday and later in the regular season against Texas A&M, Oklahoma State, and Missouri. And if they get through that gauntlet, they will still have to win the Big 12 title game against one of those Big 3 they skip.

HAWAII: This team, in my opinion, actually has the best chance to run the table because the only tough game they have left is against Boise State, but at home. Still, you could easily see them get skipped over by two different one-loss teams.

To further the playoff argument, we also need the following 1-loss teams to lose again, preferably in this fashion: LSU, to Alabama (a loss to Saban, wouldn't that just tweak them to no end) or in SEC title game to Florida; Oklahoma, either to Texas Tech or Oklahoma State, so they play the Big 12 title game with 2 losses; Texas Tech, to Texas or to a 1-loss Kansas team in the Big 12 title game; South Carolina, to either Tennessee, Florida, or Clemson; Kentucky, to either Florida or Tennessee; West Virginia, to Rutgers or Louisville, or even Pittsburgh; USC, to Cal or UCLA, or even Notre Dame, and California, to Stanford.

Oh, and I would invite Appalachian State to play in the playoffs this year... provided they win the D-IAA (I refuse to call it the subdivision) playoffs again.

10/18 UPDATE: South Florida lost to Rutgers! And then there were five...

New sounds from The Boss, and same old sounds from The Boss

Item One: Thank you Cleveland

As I mentioned last week, only one thing could provide me with some solace about the monu-Met-al collapse of my team down the stretch in the baseball season, and that solace came in the form of the Cleveland Indians defeating the Evil Empire, eliminating them from the playoffs in the first round for the third consecutive year.

All that money spent, and all it could purchase the Yankees was 1 playoff victory, which is 1 more than my company's softball team has - and we don't even have a softball team (yet). So now, I could care less who wins the World Series, because at least it won't be the Yankees (again). 7 years, $1.5+ billion in salary (you read that right, billion), and no rings to show for it.

And then Steinbrenner, jackass that he is, says that Torre will go if they don't win? Hey George, there you go, always able to find a scapegoat. How about taking the hit yourself for a change? How about your GM? Or, and this shocks me that he always gets a pass, how about Derek "4 for 17 with 1 RBI and no runs scored" Jeter? The captain is supposed to lead, not let others take the fall for him.

Thank you Cleveland for also preventing us from seeing another "victory lap" from Roger Clemens. Made me feel great seeing him limp off the field Sunday - hey Roger, get a better cell phone connection and stay retired this time. If nothing else, it will save us from having to hear Yankees announcer Susan Waldmyn from climaxing on the radio again.

Typical Steinbrenner, fire the manager. Hey George, maybe Buck Showalter will come back to manage for you, or Clyde King, or Yogi. Hell, knowing you, you'll find a way to exhume Billy Martin's body and have him manage again. Your act is tired - sell the damn team already or have someone else run it - do the one thing you didn't do your entire reign as owner by selling the team and leaving with some class and dignity.


Item Two: Springsteen is still a Magic Man
When I heard that Bruce Springsteen had put the E Street Band back together for another studio album and tour, I winced in hesitation at first. Consider that music has changed (whether for the better or not is another topic), he'll always have any album measured by the classics from early in his career, and the advance info about the songs being "laced with politics" had me concerned. Like any great athlete or entertainer in the latter stages of their career, you hope for the best and expect the worst, hoping they "didn't stay on stage too long". But when I saw them on The Today Show, I just had a feeling of anticipation I hadn't felt about his music since the Live album came out.

I've listened to "Magic" all the way through about 10 times now, and while it doesn't stand on it's own measured against his top work, it still delivers what I want out of music. And unlike The Rising (which I found cathartic after 9/11) and his solo efforts, what makes this album work for me is not just Bruce, but the band as well. It's great to hear Clarence Clemons regain his title as best saxophone player on the planet; it's refreshing to here Roy Bittan's piano provide a strong undertone; Max Weinberg can still bang the drums as well as anyone; and despite the fact that most of us are still a little bit twirked off because of the way The Sopranos ended, you can hear a lot of Silvio, I mean, Steve Van Zandt's influence.

Speaking of influence, I credit my father for cluing me into the Beach Boys' Pet Sounds years ago, and you can hear some of that in "Girls in their Summer Clothes". My favorite track so far is "Long Walk Home".

Throughout the album, you can hear pieces of the old great albums of his (Born to Run, Darkness on the Edge of Town, and The River - my all-time fave), yet the songs don't sound like leftovers from early albums that were thrown in. Yes, if you listen solely to the lyrics, it does sound like a political ad, with plenty of anti-Bush, anti-war messages. But as was the case in the 80's with Born in the USA, you can enjoy the music for what it is and use the lyrics to spark discussion and reflection about where we've gone wrong as a country. You can clearly hear this if you listen the The Rising album and then Magic back-to-back. Still, the great thing about his music, and the meanings in the lyrics, have always been about the context of the music. Maybe I'm showing my age, but I like somebody who isn't just singing about bouncing in low-riders and pimping their Ho's.

Is the album as great as The River or Born to Run? No, but I'll put it this way. Jack Nicholson was brilliant in The Departed, but that performance wasn't anywhere close to his roles in Five Easy Pieces or Cuckoo's Nest or The Shining. But it still was brilliant for this time period. Magic delivers what true Bruce fans want and need: the great sound of a band in tune with it's leader, cranking out hard charging and thought provoking sounds, providing some well-needed substance in this current "style always wins" era of music. In other words: it sounds like Jersey when I listen to it, complicated, diverse, battle-scarred. Go buy it.


Item Three: Random stuff
So things are going great for Mahalo these days. We're making tremendous inroads within search, we've started to see a turn in opinions from those that initially didn't know or didn't want us to succeed, and it's growing rapidly. Some doubted we'd stay standing long enough to reach 10,000 search results by years end. Well, we're streaking past 15,000 and the group is turning it up another notch. You've gotta check out some of the How-to's we're generating, and the Greenhouse is kicking ass and taking names. Looks like I'll be returning to days after completing a 90-day run on the overnights. While I lament the solitude of the evenings, I'm excited about rejoining my daytime colleagues, and stepping up my game in the process... I've disbanded the Friday Football Forecast website, so I'll occasionally make some selections here going forward from time-to-time... and I'm really glad that hockey is back - but it's obvious my Devils are going to struggle a lot this year...Finally, sounds like a company outing is happening at the end of the month, and rumor has it that it will involve karaoke. For those of you that have seen my act back East, I guess you know what's in store for those that haven't seen it yet here out West, "...wait 'til they get a load of me!" Keep you posted on that...

One more time Yankee fans, "Ding dong, the wicked witch is dead!!!!!"

Yellow tape surrounding Shea Stadium

It could be worse, the Mets could be the only team in baseball history to blow a 3-0 series lead and lose like the 2004 Yankees did to Boston in the ALCS.

This, and another year of re-running the Mookie Wilson Game 6 1986 World Series highlights, is all I can cling to for another year as a Mets fan. Now I know what it must have felt like as a Sox fan to watch Bill Buckner limp off the field after gaffing that infamous little roller up along first.

If you know me and are planning on interacting with me in the next few days, here's a heads-up: a nod of approval, a pat on the back, and a 'let me buy you a drink' suggestion are probably the only things to start and/or finish a conversation with me about this week. Don't suggest anything else in a conversation, because trust me, I will very quickly find a way to turn any such conversation into a rant about how a team can blow a 7 game lead in the NL East with 17 to play. Better to just hand me a piece of paper with a suicide hot line number on it and quickly walk in the other direction.

Give the Phillies credit, by the way: they won games these last 3 weeks that they had to in order to put themselves in position to take advantage of the situation. Now we'll see if these Phils are able to be the Philadelphia sports team that finally rids their town of the dreaded Curse of Billy Penn. For Phillies fans that have seen their franchise become the first in pro sports to lose 10,000 career games, the first pitch of their post-season will at least do one thing: make it so that the memory of Mitch Williams giving up the 1993 World Series ending homer to Joe Carter get removed as the last post-season baseball moment in Cheese Steak Land.

And it wouldn't even be so bad to endure this collapse if the Mets were the only New York team. Not only do I have to endure a post-season without the Metropolitans, but I have to endure it knowing that "The Evil Empire", who were left for dead in July as being out of the playoffs, have once again emerged as one of the post-season participants.

So who's to blame? Well, that's easy enough - ME! Yeah, the first year I live in California for an entire baseball season, the first year I live the entire season in a time zone other than Eastern, the first year I admit to watching more (dare I say it) Dodger games than Mets games (I mean, how do you not want to watch games called by Vin Scully?), and the Mets respond to the first season since 1993 that I don't attend a game at Shea (a.k.a. The House that Mookie Built) by having it drip down the back of their collective legs.

Not that I don't lack for company in the blame department. I agree with GM Omar Minaya that Willie Randolph did a great job managing this team this year. He did, and that's because Minaya gave him a flawed team with which to manage. After all, if you starting pitching staff consists of: Tom Glavine, a 40+ year old lefty who can't go more than 6 innings; Pedro Martinez, a guy there was no guarantee you'd get back at all this year, and who you couldn't count on to pitch deep into games even if he did come back; Roberto Hernandez, a 50+ year old pitcher; and two unproven guys in John Maine and Oliver Perez, who them Mets squeezed every ounce of ability this year; then you better have a bullpen as good or better than last year's pen.

Last year, a late-inning Game 7 homer away from the World Series, the strength of the Mets was their bullpen. This year, it was their weakness, which was never more evident than down the stretch of the monumental collapse. It stands to reason that if you don't go out to acquire starters than can eat up innings, the bully better be able to put out fires. This year's group can only be described as the "Fahrenheit 451 Gang". Not even John Franco choked away games this badly.

Not the regulars are exempt from blame. Reyes, Beltran, Delgado, Wright - they all struggled at times during the year, never seeming to be in sync at all. I'm willing to give Reyes, my favorite player, a pass for hitting just .205 in September, because he and Wright were the reason they played well the first 5 months.

So what to do now? Well the panicky move would be to fire Randolph and/or Minaya. But one of the reasons I have always loathed the Yankees is because of the pant load that owns the team and his penchant for overreacting about everything concerning managers and players. So it would be hypocritical to expect the same of the Turtlenecks, -er, Wilpons.

That said, here's my Mets Advocate Moment: first, rebuild the bullpen - I'd start by seeing if they can pry away Jonathan Broxton from the Dodgers; second, trade Lastings Milledge (who played well when given the chance) and whatever else it takes to get the unhappy Johan Santana from Minnesota; third, get another starting pitcher that can eat up innings by the boat load (maybe Harang from Cincy or God forbid trying to get Kazmir back from Tampa). After all, like location is with real estate, baseball still comes down to pitching, pitching, pitching.

Thank goodness Springsteen's new album comes out Tuesday. I'll need a significant amount of Bruce Juice to wash down the taste of the Mets choke.